[TOEFL/Writing] Question 2 : Develop skills or Focus on training

There is some importance in developing skills. First, it is also important to try anything that gives someone opportunites. However, if it is not related to their ordinary jobs, it is just a waste to time. If people have enough time to develop themselves, they need to concentrate on developing their strenghts and imporving on their weaknesses. This is more helpful to their careers. Second, people can build new networks while developing their skills. When they develop themselves related to their current jobs, they can attend some conferences and meet new people. This could be a great opportunity to get better positions or move to other firms with better conditions. All in all, employees need to focus on developing their own skills an dealing with their strengths and weaknesses.

 

 

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• watch out some parallel structure
• using adjectives to be clear in my points
• don't miss the real point to discuss